No, mommy! I’m mad because she doesn’t like me!

Greggy, do you want to sit and eat your muffin while I drink my coffee?

I guess.

He said it with all the disdain a four (or maybe 5) year old can muster. I’d been there and I truly related to this sweet young mom and her sad little man. After all, everything is a big deal to your mom—all the tiny details of each day. It’s one of those universal truths. This is a hill I will absolutely die on, ha?

G? Do you want to play “I Spy”?

Yes! Yes I do!!

Ok, I spy something with my little eye that is BLUE! Now, I will set my timer, so look around.

Furtively, but with not a small amount of enthusiasm, Greggy looked around the still slightly frozen beach. I sneaked peeks and listened from the nearby bench where I was sipping my own coffee. Memories of doing this very same activity with my boys when they were small flooded my mind and my heart felt suddenly full of nostalgia and…light?

Then, the timer went off.

Close your eyes, Greggy. And, he complied (with intensity).

Ok, can you guess the blue item I picked?

The sky? The house? The swings?

I want you to keep your eyes closed, ok, G?

Did I get it?

Yes, it was the swing set…but keep your eyes closed. I want you to make two more guesses, but this time, tell me something you saw that was RED.

But that’s not fair. I wasn’t looking for red, Mommy.

Just try. Keep your eyes closed and think what you saw.

The lighthouse.

Okay, that’s good! Anything else?

No.

Okay, open your eyes now.

And I want you to look at me and listen. Do you see lots of red things now?

Yeah. But…

Shhhhh…

Miss Shay likes you just fine. It’s just that you aren’t paying attention to the right things. You found lots of blue things here because I told you to focus on that. Then, when I told you to name a red thing, you didn’t even think of the bench you were sitting on, or the slide right there. You have to concentrate. Put your attention on Miss Shay and think hard about what she’s saying so you can answer her questions when she asks. It’s just like “I Spy”. You can’t win the game if you aren’t paying attention to the right stuff. Does that make sense? You and Miss Shay will both be a lot happier if you stay focused on the right things.

They continued to talk for a few minutes, and then little Greggy predicably lost interest. I do think the lightbulb came on for him a little. Even more, I am certain that the Lord sent Greggy’s mom into my day. In fact, when I got up to leave, I told her that I couldn’t help but overhear her “I Spy” game, and that her wisdom was some of the most accessibly offered bit of awesomeness I had heard in some time. I also told her that she’s clearly an amazingly loving mom and that her son is so blessed to have her.

It seems so apt that what God most wanted me to hear on my walk this afternoon was advice offered to a preschooler. That’s about the right maturity level for my thick head.

I started thinking about my own “line of vision”. Maybe you can relate?

For example, if you look at your phone non-stop, you’ll inevitably scroll too much through social media. You’ll soon be sucked into believing that the world is full of darkness and negativity.

If you look to beat the clock, you’ll likely drive aggressively on the interstate looking to get there first, then you’ll find the guy in the next lane who’s ready with a middle finger.

If you look around for kindness, you’ll find the man on the plane who politely offered to get down a heavy bag, or the older gal who always takes five minutes to giggle with the special needs kid that works at the grocery store.

If you look around for love, you’ll find the person who didn’t treat your struggles like an inconvenience or wait for you to reach out. They called, they showed up, they stayed.

A big part of being happy, being at peace, being the person God called us to be, I am convinced, is to focus on the good stuff and then choose it.

A hot coffee, laden with too much cream and a packet of Splenda? I’m excited!! I mean, part of me always knows I will probably die from whatever chemicals are in Splenda, but nevertheless, that cup of coffee tastes like heaven! Ditto sunsets over lake Michigan and a new episode of that Netflix show Tom and I are bingeing together. I am a pretty fantastic hand-dancer, and then when I hear a song I love and cannot resist myself, the “dancing” itself makes me look like an absolutely foolish loon. My children have always found this habit particularly humiliating. I do not care. It makes me smile.

My self-worth is not a group decision. I’m not afraid to look ridiculous in the pursuit of joy—mine or yours. Joy? It’s more than just an emotion, it’s a gift from the Holy Spirit.

So here it is. Today’s nugget of wisdom from the Lord, courtesy of Greggy’s mom.

PAY ATTENTION TO THE RIGHT THINGS.

The world is full of goodness, because it was created by Love Itself. That includes you. You and I were made to love and be loved.

We can ask the God of hope to fill us with joy, and we can choose happiness.

Notice and be kind to a stranger, ask a friend to take a walk, donate $10 to help someone with food insecurity, text affirming words to a neighbor, call your mom. Picture the tiny bits of goodness like lights on a Christmas tree. Even one of them brightens the room, and you can’t miss it, especially if you need the light in a dark room.

Last week, when I was in Florida, my Dad told me about a family he ran into at the ice cream shop down in Marco Island. The children were young and very excited to get their sweet treat. However, the parents only had a credit card, and the shop could only take cash (or maybe it was the other way around…I can’t recall now). Dad stepped in, and even though the father of this family of cuties was uncomfortable with the gesture, it clearly made Dad’s whole week to play the hero. The goodness, you see, did more for him than it did for that sweet young family. It wasn’t even close.

Dad was paying attention to the right things. And then, he acted! Nicely done, Grandpa Jim!

As for me today, thanks to a young man and his very smart mom, I am writing a little. Mostly, it’s my way of reminding myself to approach every situation with love. That’s the goal I am going to work on a little more as lent continues. This will require me to be less defensive when Tom tells me to put my phone down, huh? It will require me to listen more. It’s hard to pay attention to the right things when all one can here is the sound of one’s own voice, ha?

A life full of peace, purpose and happiness is there for me, and for you. We just have to pay attention to the right things—and love life with the foolish enthusiasm of a four year-old boy playing “I Spy” or even a middle aged hand dancer, ha?

Peace Out, friends…

Oh, and PS…If you aren’t sure who to help today? Here’s one idea! Send $5 or $10 over to the AlwaysEditing.ORG venmo account today (@Always-Editing). . To learn more about them, visit mercifulhelpcenter.org.

+JMJ+